What is better, to be born good or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?

Ahh Skovshoved. A lovely little club in the arse end of Denmark. Legend has it, in a time long since past, another Scotsman with the same name as our newest hero managed to keep this same Skovshoved club in the third tier, but due to unforeseen circumstances never finished the job he started. But not this Jock McGhee, oh no sir-ee!

To kick things off, in the FM universe, the hall of fame is topped by Alex Ferguson, am sure a few of you valued readers have head of him? Never mind if not, anyway he’s the top dog of football managers, the big cheese if you will, and he’s the measuring stick on which we’re hoping to, erm, measure ourselves against.

Jocks journey to become the very best manager, like no one ever was can really kick off now. This time around, the team is slightly different, but the same media prediction of a season of struggle, torment and ultimately disappointment awaits. But we have something the media aren’t aware of, and that is the power of positivity, and with a bit of luck anything is possible! Or that’s the idea anyway.

Nicklas Marloth AKA Mister Versatile is the coaches pick as best player at the club. He seems more a jack of all trades master of none type player, but those multiple positions will come in handy

We actually kicked off our time in Skovshoved with a nice little team meeting, in which I laid down the law ‘We WILL survive relegation this season’

Optimistic. I like it.

‘We will progress in the cup!’

Not as much. Now I’ve seen many things in a lifetime alone, but a stadium with a stand and a car park on either side of a pitch was not one of them, until I landed here.

A pre season friendly against some local pub side. Those 2 white vans you can see, 1 belongs to our opponents keeper, who is a full time electrician and the other belongs to their starting left winger who apparently sells the Danish version of Avon, strømpebukser, in and around Skovshoved.

We don’t need to go into the nitty gritty here really, or do we? It’s obvious from the media prediction and the fact that Jock is being described as lacking the reputation of a survival specialist, that the club just wants to fight bravely against relegation, which I’m sure is an achievable task. Hopefully.

Luckily for our hero, the first opponents of the journey were also a side looking not to get relegated, and actually they’re 1 of the 4 promoted sides into the 2.division, AB Tarnby. No I’ve never heard of them either.

A good opening game for the new manager then, and because his knowledge of Danish football consists of Brondby, Michael Laudrup and Frank De Boer (he’s Dutch Jock!) Are you sure? Yes, he played for Rangers, he’s definitely from Holland. Okay then. I just know Brondby and Laudrup. Anyway we don’t know anything about Danish football is the point I’m getting across, so we ask our trusty ass man (that’s the Assistant Manager for those of a certain generation) to pick the team and formation his digital self feels the club are best suited to using. He goes with old faithful, a tried and tested 4-4-2 that’s going to take Denmark by storm.

Old faithful, 2 flat banks of 4 and the big man / not as big man combo up top. Inspired tactical choice I’m sure you’ll agree.

Tarnby weren’t ready for the onslaught of Sam Allardyce-esque football the heroes of Skovshoved were throwing at them. Gustav Therkildsen is a 6 foot 2 right winger with all the attributes of a striker, he even has the preferred move plays with back to goal, and it was him that got the opener with a deft touch into the net.

Anders Junge, the not so big man in the 2 up top combo doubled our lead on 20 minutes. We allowed Tarnby to get a goal in the second half to give them a bit of hope, we felt this was the nice thing to do before right winger Rohde put the game to bed on 72 minutes.

The last goal came with the last kick of the game, and we gifted them that goal. It was our way of saying welcome to the big leagues of the third tier of Danish football. It helps their goal difference slightly, consider it an early Christmas present.

The fact 100 fans made it in to the stadium during a pandemic concerned us slightly. None were wearing masks either. Best go get tested.

The superstars of Skovshoved picked up where they left off as Hillerod found out, going down quicker than a Mackem bird on a Saturday night as they bowed out of the cup early on. See lads, I told you we’d make progress in the cup this year!

The team could be forgiven for thinking relegation would be an afterthought, as we went the first 4 weeks of Jocks debut season almost unbeaten. 5 wins, 1 draw and a loss meant we were sitting pretty in pink, sorry third place in the league after 6 played.

Food for thought for Jock and the superstars of the Skovshoved then. Currently kicking back in 3rd place and not really looking over their shoulder at relegation just yet, and only 3 points off the top.

Could be worse I guess.


Next chapter – The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference

Previous chapter – This isn’t a new beginning, more of a fresh start

References – 5

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